The Thatched House Update Number 15

Yesterday morning we headed off with satnav, map and compass and tried to find our way to faraway Fakenham. It was like going on holiday and felt very daring and courageous.

We pulled into the Aldi car park and it felt like we were on a mission. Queuing to get into Aldi was strange but didn’t take as long as the line had suggested. The socially distancing rule was closely adhered to, hand and trolley washing completed and I was invited into the store by a very polite chap. The store carried most stuff and I left the high security check out desk with goodies.

The day flew past and not much was achieved.

The daily address came on the radio / tv and every other device known to man. Dominic Raab headed the show.

Perhaps it is just us but he has the aura and personality of a dead flat fish. Monotone, depressing and completely uninspiring are his positive attributes. Anyway someone has to stand up there and as most of the others have pulled a sickie, it was Dom’s go.

Laura C seems hell bent on causing political unrest, she’s obviously a clever cookie and top journalist but at the moment it appears her desire is to be a pain in the rear and foster unrest.

Get a grip Laura C is what we think, we could do with you being “Little Miss Sunshine” not – A PITA.

Bojo is now out of ICU. He’d only been in there for monitoring and once he could go to the gym three times a day, decork a bottle of chianti and order a Deliveroo they thought it safe to let him go back to the ward and let someone poorly have his bed.

Still he is our PM and we know who the deputy is so best cotton wool Bojo.

As the evening wore on the mostly good people of Brisley prepared for the NHS clap. Prior to the clap “Harry” the flasher was seen. I have cut and pasted this piece from a local paper-

STOP PRESS

The pretty Breckland village of Brisley saw Harry the cycling flasher on their streets. A once prevalent flasher, Harry had not been spotted for a number of years.

Brisley residents, out sharing the clap, witnessed a significant flashing display from this ageing cyclist. Mrs P from Woods Lane welcomed Harry’s commitment to the cause but said she couldn’t face her sausage casserole. However her friend Ness said her meatballs had been tastier than ever.

Church Street and School Road seems to be the areas where most people are happy to share the clap.

After the ride a spokesperson for Harry said that he was exhausted, he had been stressed and worried that with the passing of time his flashing days may have gone. It was thought that the nice warm weather had helped and vowed to flash in Brisley next week. Emboldened by his success Harry promised more prominent flashing and musical accompaniment.

STOP PRESS

After tea we watched a family living with Tourettes. A lovely lady had developed the problem later on in life. I’m not a particularly emotional person but did find it very sad for her and her family. That said they coped with it amazingly.

In a naughty schoolboy way I couldn’t help finding it amusing the way her problem had her using expletives towards unsuspecting grannies. The older ladies sitting there minding their own business, probably thinking about where to go for a cream tea, were verbally abused with some tasty swear words.

A fascinating programme, I particularly liked how she had managed, most times to say “Countryfile” instead of something unmentionable.

Anyway speak tomorrow stay safe and keep smiling

Ian Clare and The Furries